The most beautiful thing you can wear is confidence.” — Blake Lively

This summer, I had the pleasure of doing a speaker series for an early college program based in North Carolina. The staff at this early college program purchased copies of my book, Dealing with This Called College, and asked me to create a lecture to help inspire their students and prepare them for college. For five weeks, I hopped on Google Meet with students and led a presentation called ‘Becoming A Superstar Student.’ I took my presentations very seriously and was excited to engage with students and instill valuable life lessons. 

My presentation consisted of six parts:

• Introductions
• Discussing Self Confidence 
• The Keys To Academic Success
• How to Make Good Friends
• Ways to Fight Social Media Addiction 
• And Discussing Mental Health 

I did my best to be informed throughout my lecture, filling my slides with statistics and data. I made a concerted effort to be engaging consistently, allowing for questions and comments. It was also my goal to come across as personable and as warm as possible, which I found to be rather tricky on Google Meet, but it seemed to work. While speaking, I felt on fire as I was doing what I felt I was born to do; lecturing the students felt like purpose-driven work. 

As the presentation concluded, I was deeply interested in what the students learned, what part of the presentation meant the most, and everyone’s thoughts. I once heard Oprah say, “feedback is your friend.” So after my presentation, I asked my students about my lecture. Did my jokes land? Was I likable? Did I say anything of value? As the students chimed in on the video conference, continuously, they all articulated in some way that my module on self-confidence was most impactful. 

“I like how you talked about self-respect and speaking positively about yourself to yourself.”

“The part on self-confidence spoke to me because that’s what I struggle with daily.” 

“Not comparing myself to others is something I’ve always struggled with; thanks for teaching us about that.” 

Each week students seemed to talk about my lesson on self-confidence. I began that section by talking about my journey from being a bullied middle school kid to being a self-confident person. I taught about how important it is to believe in yourself and love yourself, flaws and all. After these sessions, I reflected on my journey through school, and I couldn’t recall when I felt I was explicitly taught about self-confidence. However, it is such an essential ingredient to achieving any success. 

• It takes confidence to give a presentation in class. 
• It takes confidence to start a business. 
• It takes confidence to present yourself powerfully in a job interview. 
• Confidence is a prerequisite to all success.

I think if it weren’t for the self-confidence that I’ve developed over time, from reading the right books, watching lectures on YouTube, and trial and error, I would be a completely different person. As a preteen, I was bullied, I dealt with feelings of inadequacy, shame, and disenfranchisement. During my early years of adulthood, I sought ways to become a more confident person. That self-work that I did and continue to do has helped me so much. I’ve matured from that insecure young teenager, to a man who believes he can do anything. 

If there was one thing, I believe that all students should be taught about this upcoming school year it would be: self-confidence. We should be teaching children about affirmations, self-reflection, and self-love. When you are a self-confident person, you don’t need to put others down. A self-confident person knows how to handle adversity and push through the tough times. Imagine what our world would be like if we all made a conscious effort to teach children about loving themselves and practical steps to embody self-love. I think the world would be a better place. 

In my future lectures, books and professional work I plan to continue to get people thinking about self confidence and the power that it brings. I encourage all parents and educators to do fun activities to get students thinking about confidence and loving themselves. If there are any simple tasks that you or someone practice for teaching students about self-confidence, I would love to hear them. We all have a responsibility to leave the world a better place than we found it, and teaching youth about self-confidence is a sure way to do that. 

Be Inspired!